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Decade Beginning January 1, 2010 Friday

Posted by mrvangeldren in Belleville, Friends.
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It’s the last day of 2009 and I should be making the best of the time I have left of this year, right? Well in my opinion time goes on, practically moving without anyone noticing. Seconds become minutes and those minutes turn into days, before you know it those days turn into months and so on. So I don’t live for the year, I live for each and everyday.  I mean don’t they say that your teenage years are your most miserable ones? If they don’t then I do.

Sometimes I look back on this year and I wish I could forget everything that happened, “the year I want to forget.” I always thought since such sad things happened it’s not worth remembering. Even these past few months of my senior have sucked and friendships seem to only be getting worse, in my opinion. I used to think that being optimistic was the better route to take, but pessimism can never fail. Because when you already expect the worst then nothing is bound to surprise you.

It’s just that somedays I wish I could have friends who think about me the way I think about them. I want  friends that think about inviting me out when they are making plans. Someone who would walk around town with me just to enjoy our time together. Friends who would drive around at night when I need someone to talk to. Friends that know how I am feeling even when I don’t tell them. Friends that text you first. Friends that can just sit around and lay in our beds together almost falling asleep and calling that an amazing day. Friends that like me as much as I like them.

I could count the number of friends that I described on one hand and I wouldn’t be using all five fingers.

Maybe in reality I need to be more independent and stand on my own two feet. I need to stop leaning on others for support. But it’s just so difficult when I can’t find support in my own house. I look for that comfort somewhere else and I think that just maybe my friends can somehow provide what I am in search for. I expect way too much from people.

Life gets better after high school. Right Tram?

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Comments»

1. tminx - January 1, 2010 Friday

life does get better after high school,
but you might have to step out of your immediate surroundings..
participate in the the things you really want to do
and you’ll make the right kind of friends…
it took me forever to figure that out……

mrvangeldren - January 1, 2010 Friday

I just wanna go to college and find myself.

2. Lázaro Manuel - January 1, 2010 Friday

“Because when you already expect the worst then nothing is bound to surprise you.”

Optimism keeps your standards high, your drive at it’s peak. The pessimist never succeeds, because, according to his own beliefs, he can’t.

Be a realist if you want, Michael, but leave pessimism for the weak. You deserve the best, so expect it and work for it.

I believe in you.

3. drinkatoasttome - January 2, 2010 Saturday

fingers?


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